Regular readers may have noticed that there are a few things missing. I apologize for any broken links. I decided to delete certain posts from the past year and a half because it’s a lot of unnecessary wordage just to say that I’ve learned my lesson about being an African woman practicing an African belief system in Israel. There is no dating as most people would define it. One should simply not have relationships with strangers. If I’ve known someone less than a year, maybe more, and they haven’t done anything to show that they value me other than talk, they should be kept at a safe emotional distance. My instincts were right from the start. He has no loyalty.
Looking back, I find the fact that he actually criticized me for my “stewardess smile” utterly hilarious. He was basically hurt because I instinctively treated him as he deserved to be treated. So my judgement and selection was fine all along. I know what I’m doing, and who I’m with once we’ve touched, so I am never letting someone else convince me to question my gut again.
It’s not that Diva’s advice was bad. It’s just that some lies one can’t really detect without getting really close. It’s like the perspective of the chief as opposed to an undercover cop working in the actual case. Sometimes there’s going to be a conflict between what the administrators see and the people actually seeing what’s going down are seeing.
So in the end, I’m alright. I understand why I needed to go through that phase. It was to teach me to trust my gut and to make me more grateful for the real people I have in my life already.
Once the lesson is learned, dwelling on the details is just useless rumination.