Yesterday, I spelled out the game. Now I’m going to make it very clear that I am not playing.
If I have to be cruel to someone to keep them, I would rather not. Besides, there are a few guys around who have some damned sense. A few of them are my bros. If a woman treated them the way most men here pretty much demand to be treated, they would kick her to the curb.
I don’t want to be in a sick relationship wherein I am a bad caricature of an alpha male, punishing betas and gammas for historical wrongs they, in their current states of unmanliness, aren’t even capable of committing.
So what I plan to do is a sort of adjusted compliance test. For those who don’t know, a compliance test is a PUA term for tests to see whether or not a woman is sufficiently submissive to function above a fuckbuddy level. If a woman reacts with hostility or lack of enthusiasm for pleasing her potential man/Lesbian partner, then she will be limited to sex-only or simply rejected.
Well, in my case, it has to be that if my being good to someone makes them run away or take me for granted, then “next bitch…”
Yes, I have physical needs that should be met if I don’t want to be frustrated. So it’s good to know how to play the game when needed, to avoid a situation of deprivation. However, I do not wish to become emotionally entangled and invested in a sick interaction where I have to think hard about when is the last time I answered the phone when someone called, and whether or not I’ve crossed the weekly allowable responses to SMS’s.
I am also not attracted to unmanly men. Or I should say, non adult men. I am attracted to some men who have a bit of a feminine streak, so long as they own it and still behave with a certain level of courage. I just can’t deal with emotional weaklings. If someone hates themselves to the point where they enjoy being mistreated, then I don’t need to be around that kind of negativity.
So I’m cool with basically objectifying people who ask to be objectified. It’s just that these people, at least when dealing with me, should understand they’re not going to get very close to me, and are on borrowed time. I am mindful of the customs here now, and will not take anyone seriously unless or until my name is tattooed on their chest, they’re renting us an apartment, or the tsimmer, but I am very not sexually interested in emotional masochists. So my contempt for them will be quite genuine, and I hope they don’t take it as Klingon flirtation.
To a greater degree than in the past though, I will allow the man to lead the dance. I was already doing that, but more in the way of being a supportive and expert partner. Now, I understand that I should be almost completely limp, and wait for instructions. My bros, the good men, have no trouble articulating their needs, and letting a girl know when she’s doing well or badly. So I don’t think I can go wrong if I pretty much wait for their compliance tests before deviating from the default tsimmer script.
Though I may seem a bit cold, I do have a high degree of pity for Israeli men who have fallen for this situation. They don’t seem to realize that this is a monster that feeds on itself, and their society is being destroyed at the roots: the couple/family level. Pity does not make me wet though, so I can’t push through it as well as most Israeli women apparently do, for the sake of producing children. I just can’t make myself have sex with a guy I know in advance is going to basically punish me for not laying still like a corpse with my head turned to the side, or cooking for him, or being concerned about his wellbeing, or basically doing what a woman is supposed to do for her man. I just can’t.
Being honest with self, upon being informed of the real issues at play, I am having an easier time now, with the two guys who dumped me for not being Jewish. I mean, even though this is a sheeple or sellout reason, those two guys enjoyed being treated like men. Well, the second one enjoyed being treated like a woman sometimes too, but he thought it was sweet that I was mindful of his needs, and stuck with me for a couple of years. I still wish they were dead, but the sentiment is more along the lines of wanting them dead violently and dramatically, not quietly put out of their misery like sick pets.
I’m having the sick pets feeling about the sorry assed wusses with NMS who enjoy being treated like crap. Their manhood is broken. I don’t see how a guy can live like that. Maybe they only live because they’re too chicken to die with dignity. So they do the slow suicide of allowing themselves to be shat upon by harpies, one of whom might marry them and deign to have sex with them once or twice a month until enough babies are made, and then stop.
But then, there’s my solipsism. I see this as a pathetic waste of a life, but perhaps they see it as heroic suffering for a cause.
I can tell myself that until I consider the fact that even the least of these animated piles of fertilizer thinks that he is too good for me. Their manhood is broken to the point that social class actually means something to them, but their perception of what class is has been warped by a weird paradoxical socialism supported by de facto slavery. Foreign workers do most of the grunt work here, and even though I’m a webmaster and spiritual counselor, because I’m African and not in any of the major religious/ethnic groups here, they decide upon looking at me that I must be a slave.
Any kindness or compassion I show is interpreted as a kind of natural servitude. In their minds, I’m not kind to them because I was raised with strong values; I’m kind to them because Africans are supposed to be servile towards everyone else. So they can take it for granted because in their fantasy world, I am the only thing that is a lower worm than they are.
So they feel they can afford to take out on me, the frustration and cruelty they experience from Israeli women. I get to see the dark side because they believe that I am safe to exploit. They are shocked when I become angry about being mistreated. They don’t see mistreating me as mistreatment. I should be happy someone bothers to speak to me at all.
I understand now that I was inadvertently feeding a stereotype about African women. By being kind to others by default, I was confirming, in their minds, that we are easily exploitable without consequences. They were legitimately surprised when I showed anger because people like me are not supposed to be entitled to be angry.
So from now on, I put my worst face forward. No more Miss Nice Girl. Make way for the Queen!
Dudes here say they hate this, but I invite them to prove it. Before I put my hands to the keyboard in this, I did some experimenting. Behaving like a snotty bitch has gotten me all sorts of neat stuff from my newly subjugated underlings. Guys who found me totally unattractive before are suddenly interested, and guys who neglected me or ignored like the one message a week I can bring myself to send someone to ask how they’re doing, suddenly want to keep in touch.
Something I find incredibly funny…one of them called me five times yesterday before I answered. Before, I hadn’t heard from him in two weeks because the last time he called, I answered right away. Nothing happened from it, but I did have a conversation, listen to his problems, etc. I pretty much yelled at him and told him I was tired of his inconsistency and that he should find who else’s mind and/or body to fuck.
When I yelled at him in my haughtiest tone, he remarkably didn’t hang up like someone with testicles should if he was talking to a woman who’s just a potential fuck buddy. He tried to calm me down and said, “Oh you’re just angry about something right now. I’ll call you back tomorrow.”
I was like, “No, you don’t understand. I don’t want to talk to you anymore. I don’t care if I never see you again. I am tired of you and so-called men like you wasting my life!”
And he says…
“It’s okay, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
:: sigh ::
I really don’t care of this guy drops off the face of the Earth except in the karmic sense that maybe one day if I get injured in the water or bitten by a pissed off dolphin or something, he might save my life. I doubt he’d be useful in such a situation though. He’d have to think about it for a month and ignore my cries and gurgling.
It really sucks, but being a bitch works. It isn’t a good shield from alphas except maybe as a repellant, but it is a good motivator for the weaker ones so they remember their place. Since they are socially dependent, in order to keep their darker tendencies at bay, one has to make it clear to their primitive, simple minds that I am not a woman to be trifled with. This has always been so, but they used to have to test me to find out. Now, they’ll just get the warnings in advance.
When I meet guys who respond well to my civility, I’ll move it up a notch to politeness, and if that goes well, active niceness, and if that goes well, I might become interested. If anywhere along that line, they respond negatively or become avoidant, that’s my bitch switch.