you believed no one could understand
and so it didn’t matter what i said
nothing that i could have done compared
to the drama you played out in your head

as many times as i said that i could wait
so long as there was something to wait for
as many times as i said i’ll be here
and when you want me i’ll come to your door

as many nights i occupied myself
with my own work to keep from missing you
as many ways that i apologized
for any slip or fail in trusting you

nothing i could do was good enough
because you’d already decided for me
you’d made made a self fulfilling prophecy
and set me up making excuses to ignore me

so there was no way that i could win this
your mind was made up that first night we met
so you might as well have stayed away from me
you’re now the first love in my life that i regret


My pronouns are whatever you're comfortable with as long as you speak to me with respect. I'm an Afruikan and Iswa refugee living in Canaan. That's African American expat in Israel in Normalian. I build websites, make art, and assist people in exercising their spirituality. I'm also the king of an ile, Baalat Teva, a group of African spirituality adherents here. Feel free to contact me if you are in need of my services or just want to chat.

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  • You’ve read the article, now get the t-shirt! :-D